Do You Talk to Your Mother With That Language?!

Day 5 is a gloomy lazy day, perfect for watching a documentary.  Today's selection?

Hungry For Change

I give it 5 out of 5 for every day I've made it without makeup. 

Much like Miss Representation, Hungry For Change deals with the diet industry and the lies it feeds us (pun intended) to fund a multi-billion dollar industry. 

What's the key to losing weight?

"I accept myself unconditionally right now!"

Something I've been repeating to myself throughout this no makeup process.

And I was reminded of an assignment I created some years ago from a self deprecating conversation I was having with a friend. I was berating myself for, who knows what, my meal choice, my man choice, whatever, and she stopped me and said, with no lack of passion, "would you talk to anyone the way you talk to yourself?!".  Answer is, of course not!  Which got me thinking, what are the things I say to myself on a constant basis?

So I went home, grabbed my journal and began to create a list of all the negative things I was saying to myself at the time - I wish I had a funkier wardrobe, why can't I just lose weight, my skin is a mess, why do I still obsess over that guy?! and on it went until I had 40 things written down on my list that I held against myself.  

The assignment was simple.  Each day I would take one item from the list and address it as though I was speaking to a friend.  Why this works for me is because I give FAR greater grace and understanding to my friends when they are struggling then I give to myself.  

I'd like to say the assignment instantly turned my life around as I began to swim in a sea of self love but the truth is, the list actually took a couple of years to complete.  I'd forget about it or, more truthfully, avoid it but it always lingered in my mind and I would be reminded of it every time I'd hear a friend say, "you're so hard on yourself".  

This year I finally completed it because, more and more, I desired the same acceptance and love for myself that I bestowed on others.  The funny thing is, looking back at some of the things that were on my list I thought "Really? that made it on there?! I was actually holding that against myself?"

In the end I found, and continually find,  the grace to be me.  And as I forgive myself for all the things I'm not, I have begun to really become aware of all the things I am!  

I go back to the quote I used on my original post.  "Love is not love which alters when alteration it finds".  What this says to me is that, through the eyes of true love there is only acceptance and grace. 

 Most mothers when they look at their child see only pure beauty and wonder.  If someone were to come and suggest a few areas they could tweak, she would lunge at their throats like a lioness protecting her young - just ask my teacher friend when she suggests that a student perhaps needs some learning assistance to a parent!  The love of a parent is unconditional. 

So I accept myself unconditionally because I love me! I'm fun and I have really cool friends and I sing when punching in my pin number at Tim Hortons and I've had the opportunity to impact people's lives and I'm a hard worker and I like art and well, enough about me.

So my challenge to you, my No Makeup Maykers, as you go through this month and as you see yourself, maybe for the first time, look through the eyes of love.  Let's stop being our own worst critic and start being our own best lovers!